I realized that I needed a #positivetweet day. With so much negativity in the world, I decided that I had to regroup and figure out all the good things I have going on in my life right now. I think that we can get caught up in all the problems and issues out there in human space, especially when we can't individually do anything about any of them. When you harp on all the negative things you cannot control, this leads to sadness and depression. Making all the good in your life disappear. So in honor of #postivetweet day, I have decided to write a #postivepost.
Mr. GS is inordinately happy. I realized the other day that he has been in school continually since he was 5 years old. He has never had nothing to do. Even when he wasn't in school or in ESY he had to go to therapy, doctors and tutors. But today is really different. He sleeps (but of course), eats, watches videos, plays World of Warcraft, eats again, exercises, eats again and then when I remind him of our deal, where he didn't have to get a job before his masters program starts in July, he does a few chores.
He laughs all the time and tries to hug me (yeah). He has taken to cooking his own pasta and even enjoys the independence associated with being the chef. When I try to correct him about something in the kitchen, he tells me that he's cooking his way....so as long as his way leaves the kitchen in tact, I let him be.
CM2 is finally getting the hand of the reality of what studying is all about. He had a rocky start to his summer Spanish class, but I remembered an old trick of mine from when he was in high school. Scheduling. He has to write out a schedule everyday to study and figure out what he needs to do.
He was reluctant at first. Thinking he could remember what to do when by memory. But I reminded him that he forgets and gets lost in his live streaming videogame exploring channel Twitch. So as long as his favorite twitch show gets worked into the schedule (which it does), it works out quite well.
I also have him study at the dinningroom table. He wears noise-canceling head phones and all noise is banished from his vicinity. Meanwhile if Mr. GS wants to sit in the near quadrant of his brother he has to also wear noise-canceling headphones to play videos or games on his laptop. Me I am exiled to the basement, or my bedroom, with my laptop and electronic toys.
But you know what. It has worked out. He just got a 96 on his last vocabulary quiz. So I will live the summer in my bedroom as long as this keeps up. I think CM2 also really realized the mind-body-"good grade" connection. It has taken awhile but we may have finally had a breakthrough. Positive thought that this new attitude/acceptance of reality will keep up.
The boys are getting along. Since Mr.GS is so happy and CM2 seems to have figured out studying for now, they are pleased with themselves. I hear less squalling between them. They talk, they discuss, they interact as if they were actually becoming adults...YEAH. As long as they stay away from politics everything is fine.
They even sat and watched The Big Bang Theory together last night. CM2 had gotten a bug up his butt about the portrayal of people with aspergers on that show. He really was annoyed that the producers had made Sheldon out to be clueless as to what was or was not racism.
You see, CM2 prides himself on his mindfulness of others and how others want to be treated. In fact he works hard to be aware of racial, sexual orientation or gender based discrimination. So he resented terribly the characterization of people with aspergers as ignorant, albeit unintentional, bigoted dolts. But his animus towards BBT seems to have gone away, at least for now....The latest episode the boys were watching dealt with when Sheldon and Howard were fighting over a parking space and how the characters ended up playing naked penis pranks on each other. (If you throw a penis joke in there CM2 does seem to find it hilarious.)
Needlesstosay when the boys are happy we are happy. But as for ourselves:
I had been having some weird palpitations and finally went to my doctor who of course sent me to a cardiologist. Remember February is Heart Disease Awareness month and it is something women need to think about as well as men. Heart disease is the biggest killer of American women. So don't dismiss those aches.
Today the cardiologist (a she) did an echocardiagram of my heart. That is an ultra sound of all the heart chambers. It was really cool watching my heart "beat" up on a screen. The last time I had seen a heart like that was when I was 5 months pregnant with CM2 and we saw his heartbeat on the ultrasound during the amnio. Happily, the heart seems fine. But just to be certain she wants me to do a stress test and then wear a 24-hour heart monitor. She told me that alot of times, palpitations are a characteristic by menopause. But don't just assume that's what the issue is, make sure you find out for certain.
So apparently night sweats is not enough. Now I get to have pounding in my throat as if my heart is gong to jump up into my head too because my hormones can't decide whether they are walking, skipping or running away...(Yes I know its suppose to be "positive post" not snide-smartass-post, but I couldn't help myself with this one, and when you go through menopause you will know exactly what I mean about not being able or not wanting to hold back.)
Now the hubby is happy because since the weather is finally getting warmer, he can take care of all that nasty damage left over from the hurricane last year. He finally rebuilt the back fence and is working on mending the fences in the front of the house. He likes to wood work and paint. It gives him a great sense of accomplishment when he can take care of his own home. In fact, he has finally primed all the paint-needed-spaces in the house and told me he is going to finish the touch-ups all this weekend. The inside of the house is no longer going to look like it is covered in calamine lotion and suffering from chickenpox. YEAH.
The dogs are calm. Even they are content. It must be a good sign. Animals are very perceptive. When we are stressed, they are stressed. Considering my pack merely lays about all day, barely barks and only wants to be fed and play, I would say the family-vibes right now are pretty good.
And above all, the house is quiet right now. So very positively quiet.