We were supposed to be on vacation in Florida this week visiting my mother. But she called the morning that we were leaving and told us she had the flu and not to come. Thank heaven we weren't winging our way through the friendly skies at that moment. The last thing we needed was to walk into a house with flu and my mother knew it. Also how could she entertain or spend time with us if she felt awful. Ironic part in all of this is that I actually spent the weekend in bed, flued-in myself. Could there have been any crappier vacation than if we had actually gone? Hubby feels awful today. No, not mom's fault, unless somehow she could have transmitted the flu virus through facetime or telephone.
Meanwhile how did the boys deal with this change in schedule? Actually they both did quite well. CM1 even got on facetime and chatted with his grandmother asking her how she was and telling her he loved her. That is his new thing. Every time he talks to her he tells her that he loves her. I know he feels the passing of his grandfather profoundly, wears grandpas watch every day, even sleeps with it on. Honestly though, he didn't mind not going. Truth be told he wasn't so happy about flying. He watches too much "Seconds From Disaster" and it has made him some what of a worry-wart on the subject of air travel. (Yeah something new to deal with.Why not?) Having Sheldon channeling train travel doesn't help much with the airtravel issues either. CM1 and hubby actually looked into taking the ACELA down to Florida from where we live. Not only is it ridiculously expensive, but can you imagine 24 hours on a train.....oh nooooo, sorry not gonna happen.
Now CM2 was not so forgiving as his older brother about the change however. He was actually annoyed. He doesn't handle change as well as CM1. You can't change personnel on him. Heck its hard for him to deal with outgrowing his clothes. He gets upset when anything is thrown away. We are trying to teach him the difference between keepsakes and garbage at this point. (Trying to keep him off the show Hoarders. Yep another issue for another day. Yeah us!) At times, when his day does get interrupted or messed up however, he really does have a CM2 version of a meltdown. Now its not terribly bad anymore, but he gets really grumpy for awhile and you just need to stay out of his way and eventually he will come around.
In all truth I don't think either boys really had that much of a hard time moving on to the next thing to do. CM2 stayed by his computer...a little too much this vacation actually. Yes we were able to get him to go to the gym, work outside helping with the snow and do some chores in the house. But his attachment to his games, chatrooms (mostly discussing religious fanatics or fundies as they are called in his world) and now twitter too is quite the little obsession. (OK I know, who am I to talk about a social media obsession..)
Luckily, hubby is home for these few days and he has already taken the boys out to do some fun things. Last night they went go-cart racing. It was nice that even though CM1 doesn't have a drivers license, being over 21 he could still drive a cart. CM1 was stoked afterwards to say the least. CM2 and hubby ran errands to Homedepot and for ice cream. Plus the behavioralist is still coming and she took the boys out for their respective practice sessions. Also, I called up the volunteer center and told them we didn't go away afterall and the boys can come in this week to work. They were very pleased to say the least.
Truth of the matter is, that in times gone by a change in plans would have meant a huge stressor for the boys and it would have taken days to get them right again. They would obsess about the change and never really let it go. It would ruin the entire rest of their time off from school. NOT so anymore. With age and therapy and teaching them to deal with "curve balls" the boys have learned to handle the unexpected. Not perfectly of course. No one can expect perfection from another human being. But I think they got as close as they could this time. For them at least.
So whenever you deal with a child not being able to handle changes in schedules remember, that eventually everything gets better. It simply takes time and alot of effort on your part. But in the end it does come together. In fact, if you have to cancel a vaca due to grandma's illness, the children will go right on with their world without skipping a beat (OK in the case of CM2 maybe a little hiccup) and they may even worry about their grandma a little bit, tell her they love her and ask how she is feeling. You may even get a hug good morning too.
OK, I have to admit, CM1's new thing is to hug me good morning when he is happy (and he is happy when there is no school) and especially when I make his favorite foods. Me like...what can I say.