This is a repost from October, 2011. While the article deals mainly with Thanksgiving, the thoughts behind it are still very relevant for every major holiday.
Last year I wrote a post and called myself a Grinch.
(Read the post. Its a goodie-promise) We are raised that we are
supposed to revel in this time of year. We are taught that our entire
society lives or dies based upon a few short hours on certain given
days. That somehow if we do not participate in these celebrations, as
prescribed by some holiday-deity (I'm talking Hallmark or Norman
Rockwell here, not God Almighty), then we have forfeited our right to be
happy at this time of year. Well, as the US commanding general at the
Battle of the Bulge, once said to the Nazis when asked to surrender, I
say "nuts" to anyone who thinks that we cannot stand up and be happy.
Honestly, I do love this time of year (Bit of a change for me from last
year I know. Maybe my temperament is better- fewer menopause symptoms-
or this post is up earlier than last year's Grinch post.) but I also
hate this time of year (OK remembering what is to come). Oh I love the
sights, the sounds and the smells. The boys love these things, not so
much. When they were little it was the sensory overload that got to
them. Too much of everything crammed into just a few short weeks that
spills over into a hullabaloo of relatives, and an unknown and
uncomfortable social reality. On Thanksgiving they used to hide in my
sister-in-law's basement away from the crush of people and watch TV or
play their video games. They sat quiet by themselves while everyone else
"holidayed." We, of course, would check on them periodically and on
most occasions their younger cousins would sit with them and watch their
dvds as well. But it was not enjoyable for them. Their holiday
experience was sorely lacking.
I know the theory behind the "get togethers" for them, has to do with
getting to know your relatives and understanding that there are people
in the world who are attached to you in some way. But that is not what
the boys learned. What they learned is that whenever they see a relative
they are uncomfortable, feel overwhelmed and quite frankly would rather
be somewhere else. There is no connection to these people they see once
a year. There is no attachment. They don't even remember people's
names.
Read the rest HERE.
