Thursday, January 27, 2011

Response to the Tiger Mom

The news has been replete with discussions about the book by Amy Chua, Battle Hymn of the Tiger Mom.  Needless to say her style of parenting has been met with contempt and charges of abuse. Here is the original article in the New York Times that started the brouhaha. I just watched Professor Chua on Fox and Friends explaining her style of parenting and attempt to resurrect her reputation. Fox and Friends asked for people's responses by email. Here is what I sent:

I truly believe that there has to be a happy middle in parenting. My husband and I require our children to do their best in school and everything they do be it music, sports and having fun, but no one can be perfect all the time. A hard won C is an even greater accomplishment than an easy A. There are times when perseverance and fortitude is what is important and not the letter grade. The ability to pick yourself up by your bootstraps is something that needs to be taught. Sometimes in life no matter how hard you try things will not be the way you want them to be and you need to learn to deal with that. I wonder what a parent who requires perfection from their children would do if they had a child with a learning disability and no matter how hard the child tried they could not process math or language perfectly?

Now I do not know Professor Chua or her husband. But I live in a town where excellence and perfection are required in the majority of homes. A child's worth is judged by their ability to get into an Ivy League college, win sports or music trophies and garner academic awards. No matter how you approach it, this mindset is just disturbing.

Until next time,


Elise

P.S. Ginabad's comment reminded me that I recently wrote a post about perfection called Boot Camp Perfect-WTF